Lent Update

So, the whole $1/breakfast and lunch isn't working out so well. Lent has turned into a "simple" breakfast and lunch with no snacking.

I am finding that this exercise is more fruitful than I realized it would be. Experiencing hunger is not something I've ever done before. Usually when I'm hungry, something has gone terribly awry in my schedule and there just isn't a chance to eat a meal. It's not something I willingly experience. And, you know what, being hungry is a thought-provoking experience. Throughout these past few days, I've realized that:

1). I don't need NEARLY as much food to survive and thrive as I usually consume.
2). I enjoy food more when I'm not constantly eating it.
3). I can find comfort/enjoyment in things other than food.
4). Because eating all the time is an option I've taken away from myself, I don't think about food as much.
5). Being hungry makes me identify with the daily experience of a great majority of the world.

Lent has never been more of a sacrifice, or more fruitful. Yes, it's hard, and probably will become harder. I have to admit that I am almost counting down the days to Easter, and planning what kind of celebrating feast I'd like to have on Easter. But I'm also thinking how I can celebrate this lent season with those who, after lent, will still feel hungry. One thought: Sharing Easter meals with people who don't have enough to eat. We'll see...

The end of the $2 challenge...for me, at least

It's been 7 days and I've consumed approximately $14 worth of food. I didn't pass out, I wasn't too grumpy, I didn't think about food all the time. I think my mental preparation helped me get through this week. And the fact that it is a temporary situation also probably helped me endure the long afternoons with no snack, and going to bed a little bit hungry.

I found myself constantly thinking - I'm hungry: I'll have some crackers when I get home; I'm hungry: I'll have a bowl of ice cream for dessert; I'm hungry - I should eat something; I'm hungry: what sounds good to eat? These are normal issues that I think about all the time, and am able to address by eating. This week, though, I experienced a little bit of what it's like not to have that option. To not have something to eat when you feel hungry.

Because I wasn't eating a wide variety of food I did experience some, uh, issues. These almost made me through in the towel and drink a large glass of fruit juice or have a salad. But then I realized that the whole point of the $2 challenge is to experience what it's really like to only have $2 to eat a day. So I suffered (mildly) through it - (ok, I did eat half of a small apple one evening!) I'm sure my body would get used to this food schedule if I continued it long enough, but my body definitely gave me signs that it was not completely happy with what I was (or wasn't) putting in it.

For the rest of lent, I am going to try to allocate about $1 for breakfast and $1 for lunch, and eat a normal dinner. No food purchased from a restaurant (except for on my sister's birthday and for ice tea when I am trying to be social) or coffeeshop. I realize that I might have to be lenient on this one - after all, relationships are more important than my lenten practice, and if the only way to spend time with someone is at a restaurant, we'll see what happens! I'm hoping to stay focused on my lent goal of not relying on food throughout the day, but then be able to eat a normal meal in the evening.

Day 1

So far, not so bad. I feel a little guilty for sitting in Starbucks with patronizing them, but a classmate is going to meet me soon, and she'll be a patron - problem solved :)

I'm a little hungry - ok, I'd really like to eat something - and am very much looking forward to my beans and rice before Ash Wednesday service. Because I was running around at my internship all day, I didn't think about food as much as I know I will when I'm at work, next to the kitchen, giving snacks to the little boy I nanny for.

Perhaps I've mentally prepared well wnough, and this isn't going to be as hard as I thought it would. I still have to figure out what I'm going to eat after tomorrow - and that may require a trip to the grocery store.

Lenten Journey

It begins tomorrow. 7 days - $2/day for food. I'm quite anxious, to be honest. I'm afraid I will be grumpy, irritated, frustrated, unable to focus on school, work, or interacting with people. But in those moments, I hope to be able to carry on, remembering that I do not live on bread alone.

But I love bread.

That is why this is my lenten journey for this year. Food consumes my life, and having to limit my intake will definitely be a challenge, and will hopefully draw me closer to God, and draw me closer to understanding the experience of over half of the world's population.

I feel a bit pretentious, going through this drama for just 7 days. For those who experience $2 or less/day, it is not a choice, not something they prepare for. They don't have all of the choices I have. I can craft my meals to make the most out of every penny, though I fear I won't because I've never had to consider exactly what I am eating.

When I was making my rice and beans for tomorrow, I made sure that no bean fell out of the strainer, that no piece of burned rice (someday I might actually learn how to cook rice :)!) was left in the pan, and that I loaded my sandwich with as much peanut butter as I allowed for in my calculation.

So, tomorrow it begins.

We'll see how it goes!

Preparing for Lent

Growing up Lutheran, Lent was a season I observed every late-winter. Lent is the 40 days before Easter (some might know it as beginning the day after Fat Tuesday). For me, the purpose of Lent is to recognize the greatest sacrifice in humankind - Christ. By sacrificing something during Lent, I am reminded of the sacrific that He made for me.

My classic lenten practice is to give up something sweet. Ice cream, all sweets, chocolate. Been there, done that. Giving up sweets is truly a sacrifice for me, and has been an excellent lenten observation for me in the past.

This year, though, I have decided to practice the season of Lent with a different observation.

Enter the $2 challenge.

I learned about this from Christine Sine of the Mustard Seed Associates (check out her blog with excellent resources at godspace.wordpress.com). The basic premise of the $2 challenge is to select a period of time when you will only spend $2/day on food as an expression of solidarity with the half of the world's population that lives on $2/day or less EVERYDAY. You can then donate the money that you saved on this food budget to an organization that helps provide food for the people who live on $2/day or less.

As I'm preparing for my week of living on $2/day, I have many thoughts running through my head. Can I do it? Will my studies be affected? Will I be irritable? What will I eat? Should I exercise? Will I be able to sleep? How will I share meals with friends? Can I study in coffeeshops? What will I do about all the food I am surrounded by everyday?

The classic verse of Matthew 4:4 comes to mind: "Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God." Do I believe this? Yes. Have I experienced it? No.

Sure I've had moments of hunger before, but never 7 days of limiting my food intake. I've never even been on a diet. Giving up sweets for Lent was difficult, but I could eat as much of any other food as I wanted to: fruit, juice, sorbet (can't compare with ice cream!), homemade bread - things that would satisfy my hunger, though not necessarily my sweet tooth.

So this lenten observation is completely new to me. I'm still in the research (trying to figure out which foods will be the most satisfying on $2/day), anticipation (trying to pray about this challenge), and logistical (when is the most feasible time to do the challenge during Lent) phase.

I'll keep you posted.

Check out: twodollarchallenge.org

ps More to come about the rest of my Lent plans!

Contradictions abound!

I want to help people and I want to be good to the environment. When these two goals come into conflict, I'm stuck. Do the ends justify the means?

I am driving about 100 miles a day at my internship. 20 miles there, 40-60 miles for appointments, 20 miles home. Yikes. When I'm driving, I try to think of alternatives for this set-up, but have yet to have any flash of genius. When you've just arrived to the country and are trying to get all of your appointments done so that you can try to have a normal life, the last thing you need to worry about is coordinating your schedule with 10 other families who are trying to do the same thing. How hospitable would I be if I refused to drive my car for appointments because I didn't want to release to much CO2 into the atmosphere?

And yet, does this mean that I drive and drive, and never try to neutralize my driving? No.

Let's face it; there are no easy answers.

I identify with Parker Palmer when he writes, "Contradiction, paradox, the tension of opposites: these have always been at the heart of my experience, and I think I am not alone." So true. It seems like the older I get and the more things I learn and experience, the more my heart and mind are faced with contradiction. But Palmer goes on to say that "perhaps contradictions are not impediments to the spiritual life, but an integral part of it. Through them we may learn that the power for life comes from God, not from us." I'm learning that it is in the place of contradiction that we realize how much we need God's guidance. That because there are no easy answers, we can't rely on ourselves to make judgements and decisions.

So, for now, I will recognize that although I am negatively affecting the environment more than I should, I am helping refugees feel welcomed, comfortable, and cared for.

And that wins this contradiction.