Will I ever learn?

There are so many things I know in my head, yet can't seem to transfer to my heart.

I know I'm not designed to run around trying to do everything I possibly can, but I do.
I know I can't have meaningful relationships with everyone I meet, but I try.
I know I can't experience everything I want to, but I continue to fill up my schedule.

I'm learning more and more about the rhythms of life - service, work, prayer, worship, and rest. And yet, I'm certainly much better at some of them than others. Friends meeting for dinner? I'm there. Walk around the lake? Yes, please. Church at 5pm? I'll pick you up. Clearing my schedule for meaningful rest and reflection? Um...could you ask me something different - like to watch a documentary, learn a new language, or freshly-baked cookies?

I know God calls me to rest in Him, but what about those who work 16 hours a day/7 days per week? Am I justified in my rest with the knowledge that so many people are currently experiencing extreme human rights violations? If I was in an oppressive situation, wouldn't I be angry if I knew that people were resting when they could be helping to secure my freedom?

When I start spiraling down this line of thought, I have to stop and remember that, as Oscar Romero wrote, I am not the Master Builder, but a worker. I am a minister, and not the Messiah. I do not have all the answers. I do not know how everything fits together. And so my position must be one of obedience. I must look to Christ to understand how to live this journey. And He clearly calls us to rest, to refreshment, to peace - not to frantic work and schedules bursting at the seams.

How to acheive this balance of rest and work, sabbath and service, community and solitude is perhaps the greatest challenge of my journey. And yet, because I have the perfect Master Builder as my guide, there is hope that, by following His blueprint, I will achieve greater balance as we continue to journey together.