Why is it that...

...I always am blogging in my head, but don't have the discipline to pull posts together?

I am becoming increasingly scattered and frantic as I add more and more to my life (and my thoughts seem to multiple at an exponential rate). I mean, who goes to the bathroom and comes out with a new career idea? This girl. Often. (Yesterday at six pm I decided that I'm going to become a career counselor at a community college, naturally).

Why can't I quiet down and focus my thoughts? Why does my mind go bananas on a regular day? Poor time management? Too much on my plate?

I don't have the answers to the above questions. I think it's a combination of too many people to meet, too many hobbies to pursue, too many books to read, too many things to learn + too many movies to watch, too many blogs to read, too many things to consume + things I have to do (work, sleep, eat, breath, exercise) + multi-multi-multi-tasking = my challenge at achieveing a balanced, non-frantic life.

My pastor is always talking about developing a rule of life - habits that help us lead the kind of life God wants us to lead: balanced, giving, prayerful, hopeful, etc. Perhaps I should focused on developing such habits. There are definitely changes I could make to my life, but it's difficult to decide what to cut down on when most of them are so life-giving. It's a cruel irony when these life-giving activities begin to have the opposite effect when I try to do too many of them :)

Oh, well, I leave this post with no new revelations (probably because I'm simultaneously facebook-chatting with a friend and listening to my Band of Horses pandora station, thinking about the laundry in I have in the dryer and the grocery list I still haven't written for tomorrow), but with a bit of too-be-continued reflection.

The discipline of blogging/journaling/reflecting is one I want to improve on, so, score me for a blog post tonight.

One day at a time...

Bookday

My birthday was wonderful for very many reasons: it was golden; tea, spaghetti, cheesecake, and donuts were consumed; Disney songs were sung; the lake was walked around; and rain fell.

But it was also wonderful because it involved an hour and a half at my favorite place: 2 stories of books - new, old, classic, foreign, you name it, you find it. Since discovering the Half Price books on Capitol Hill in April, I'd planned to pay a visit there on my birthday. So after spending the morning and afternoon enjoying a pot of tea with my roommate and a walk around the lake with a friend, I headed to Capitol Hill (with a backseat full of library books, mind you) to spend a delightful afternoon browsing through new potential friends. Here's a summary of my findings:

The Crisis of Islam, Bernard Lewis:

After having a challenging conversation with some friends about Islam this past week, I've realized that I need to stop talking about how I need to learn more about Islam, and at least take a step towards self-education. This book was a dollar and doesn't appear too intimidating which means I may just pick it up within the next few weeks.

The Problem of Pain, C.S. Lewis:

This book has been on my to-read list for quite some time, though I actually don't know specifically what it's about. As someone who faces pain (but who doesn't?), I am eager to be encouraged by the wise words of Mr. Lewis on this challenging subject.

The Asian Journal of Thomas Merton

My literary mentor + His journal about his trip through Asia = Pretty much the most excited I've been to read a book in a long time. The worlds of faith, culture, Asia, religion, adventure, insight, and reflection collide!

The No. 1 Ladies' Detective Agency, Alexander McCall Smith

For only a dollar, I should've picked up all eight copies! I'm forever lending this book out, so figure I needed a new copy because EVERYONE needs to read this series. Yelena was the lucky birthday guest to take this copy home tonight!

Burmese Language Book

On the Best Buy clearance shelf was a stack of Burmese language books. After a double-take, I knew I had to have a copy. It was just calling my name.

I also bought a journal, which brought the grand total to $13.95 (after a 20% Memorial Day discount).

Birthday bookday = Success.

I think this needs to happen next year. And maybe tomorrow as well.

Mr. Yunus

Thanks to my friend Liz and the power of Facebook, I discovered that Muhammad Yunus was speaking in Seattle.

As an aspiring social entrepreneur, I knew I couldn't miss this opportunity. I'd read Yunus' first book, Banker to the Poor, a few years earlier, and am in the beginning stages of learning about microcredit, so how could I pass up the chance to hear from Mr. Microcredit himself?

Emily, a classmate who'd lived in Bangladesh for a few years, joined me as we made our way downtown to city hall for the lecture. I told a few people about my evening plans, but none of them knew who Mr. Yunus was. Seriously? He won the Nobel Peace Prize, people - he's kind of a big deal.

We waited in anxious anticipation as we watched a preview for a documentary film coming out in the fall - To Catch a Dollar - that explores Mr. Yunus' work in microcredit. Hopefully more people will become aware of the power of microcredit through this film - I can't wait to see it!

As Mr. Yunus walked out on stage, the audience stood up in applause. A standing ovation before the lecture - I wasn't sure I'd ever experienced this before. The audience soon settled down and waited to hear what Mr. Yunus had to say.

Let me tell you, his words came at a perfect time for me. As I'm in the process of trying to focus my research and thesis, Mr. Yunus reminded me of my interest and passion in income-generating projects as a means to obtain self-sufficiency. He spoke of the power of social business, and how ordinary, illiterate people are using microcredit to develop viable income-generating opportunities for themselves and their communities. How much more then, he encouraged us, can educated, literate people unleash the power of microcredit to affect positive social change?

I realized during his lecture that though I'm quite interested in many aspects of human trafficking - border patrol, citizenship issues, cultural values, religious beliefs, etc., etc., etc. - I need to focus on income-generating opportunities because this is the foundation of my interest. Thank you, Mr. Yunus, for helping me focus!

Well, in accordance with my budget, I wasn't going to purchase any of his books that evening (though I desperately wanted to!). But by the end of the lecture, I slowly slide my credit card from it's usual perch at the top of my wallet as I stood in line to buy Creating a World Without Poverty (Emily had bought the book before the lecture so I'd had ample opportunity to gaze longingly at it as it rested between us). I purchased the book and we scooted over to the meet and greet line. Yes, friends, I was going to meet Mr. Yunus himself.

Now, I must say, I'm a bit starstruck. The closer we got to the front of the line, the faster my heart started beating. He's just another person, Ellie, I kept telling myself. And yet ordinary people don't win the Nobel Peace Prize, ordinary people don't create revolutionary economic systems, other people haven't changed the world for millions of people. Mr. Yunus is no ordinary man.

We strategized our approach before placing our books in the signing pile. Emily greeted Mr. Yunus in Bengali, and they shared a bit of conversation before he asked her if I spoke Bengali as well. She shook her head no, and then I realized what they were talking about. I said to him, No, I don't speak Bengali. And he looked at me and said (this time in English), how did you know what we were talking about?! I told him, context. We laughed. I then asked if I could take my picture with him, and he told me no, he would only take a picture with me if I spoke Bengali. We laughed again. I was joking around with Mr. Yunus. Seriously? I got behind the table and told him that I would learn some Bengali before I saw him again. I touched his shoulder. Emily took our picture. Did I just touch Mr. Yunus? We said goodbye and floated away, all the way back to the car.

The drive home was full of :I can't believe that just happened"s and "I am so glad we went tonight"s and "Can we look at the signature again?"s.

An amazing night. An amazing speaker. An amazing concept.

Time to Shop

Wednesday was the breaking point.

It's no secret that I do not enjoy shopping. Wasting time, spending money, and not knowing if I'm indirectly promoting slave labor. What's to love? The more active I've gotten in abolition work, the more convicted I've become. How can I support anti-trafficking causes when I wear clothes that people whose human rights have been violated made? It seems quite counter-productive, not to mention hypocritical.

I've successfully avoided buying new clothes for quite sometime. Chasing around after Mr. Binky means that my work uniform is usually hole-y jeans and sweatshirts. It's not exactly a fashion show when you have shoemarks and smeared food all over your clothes. In this manner, my deteriorating clothes actually come in handy. But when I was getting ready for an internship on Wednesday, I put on a black sweater and, suddenly, saw my clothes in a new light. A light that revealed how worn most of my clothes looked. I took off the sweater, knowing that I could never wear it again. That no one should ever wear it again. Ever.

Thankfully, I managed to pull an outfit together and made it to work on time. But the seed had been planted, and it was only a matter of days before I found myself riding up the escalator to the women's department of the Gap.

The Gap. A classic Ellie store. Few items. Multiple colors. Uncluttered store. Predictable. Classy. Simple.

The words of David Batstone (founder of the Not For Sale campaign) resonated with me as I browsed through the myriad of (adorable!) sweaters. The Gap received a B- on the free2work rating scale (a scale that rates a companies supply chain accountability and violation of human rights). Now, according to Batstone, a B- is not an A, but nor is it a D. A B- is much better than a D. So, for the sake of wearing clothes that don't look like they've been worn since the 70s (and because I had a giftcard), I purchased two sweaters from the Gap. And yes, they are the same sweater, just in different colors (perhaps that's the topic of another post...!).

I walked out of the store, plotting how I would dispose of my existing black cardignan - a sweater that should have been discontinued seven months ago, but was a near-daily part of my wardrobe due to functionality and comfort. There's no shape to this sweater. None. It hangs on me like a lifeless shadow of a once-beautiful garment. My new black cardignan had life and youth in it. It was ready to be worn. Ready to take on the world.

My next stop was Buffalo Exchange, a second-hand clothing store. I love the idea of recycling clothes, but sadly didn't find anything that fit me well, so I headed down to Urban Outfitters.

I had spent 10 minutes the night before searching various phrases such as "Urban Outfitters - Supple Chain Accountability" and "Urban Outfitters & Slave Labor." My research findings? Nothing except a few rants on a few blogs. Nothing on their website, and no ratings on free2work or the Better Buyer Guide.

But I went anyways. And found a cute sweater on sale. And when I looked at the tag, read that it was made in America. Happiness.

Today I wore that grey sweater. Putting on a piece of new clothing was a wonderful (and foreign) feeling. I felt good. I felt like wearing clothes wasn't just a necessary evil, but a fun expression of my style.

I'm not going to go crazy, but plan to do a bit more shopping this weekend, as well as to comb through my clothes and get rid of the many too-often-worn shirts.

I guess shopping isn't always such a bad thing - but it definitely is something we can spend more time thinking about instead of just rushing off to buy the latest fashion.

For more information on how to check the ethics of your favorite companies, check out:

www.free2work.org
www.betterworldshopper.com/rankings

La Bibliotheque

Today I became a card-carrying member of the Seattle Public Library. It was long overdue - I moved into the city nearly 2 months ago. But since I am still an avid King County Library System user (I try not to go over the lake too much, but it still happens a few times a week!), I seemed to always have good excuses not to stop by the library and get a card (and I usually didn't have a piece of mail with my new address on me).

But today, after work, I stopped by the Greenlake branch - a scenic, old building, perfect for my home branch :) I filled out the online application, took my confirmation number to the front, and was given a detailed explanation of my new rights as a SPL member. I signed my card, and walked out into the sunny late afternoon with a sense of excitement. Now, millions of books are at my fingertips. Give search, click, and boom - books and other resources sent from around the system to my branch. An email notice, dropping by the branch to pick it up, and there, in my hands, new ideas and thoughts.

How blessed are Americans to have such amazing library systems? To have access to scholarly articles, DVDs, books, magazines, computers - not to mention programs such as storytimes, computer classes, book clubs, and lectures. To have a community place that promotes inclusion, learning, and diversity. To have librarians answer questions and provide information. And all of it absolutely free.

In my opinion, one of the best things about America is the library. I know that many countries have excellent, government-funded library systems, but I also know that many countries do not. With no library system, people have less access to information, ideas, and knowledge. Children do not have picture books. There are less community meeting places. Communicating with family members around the world becomes limited.

So, with great thankfulness, I confess that I am a member of four library systems - Whatcom County, King County, Snohomish County, and, as of today, the city of Seattle. I will continue to keep collecting library memberships throughout my life (but have no current plans of moving away:) ), and continue to be thankful for the amazing resource that the government provides to people living in this country.

Now, I wonder when my nine holds will be in to my King County Library System branch...sometimes I get a little hold-happy!

Thomas Merton - Ceaseless Motion

"How many there are who are in a worse state still: they never even get as far as contemplation because they are attached to activities and enterprises that seem to be important. Blinded by their desire for ceaseless motion, for a constant sense of acheivement, famished with a crude hunger for results, for visible and tangible success, they work themselves into a state in which they cannot believe that they are pleasing God unless they are busy with a dozen jobs at the same time. Sometimes they fill the air with lamentations and complain that they no longer have any time for prayer, but they have become such experts in deceiving thmselves that they do not realize how insincere their lamentations are. They not only allow themselves to be involved in more and more work, they actually go looking for new jobs. And the busier they become the more mistakes they make. Accidents and errors pile up all around them. They will not be warned. They get further and further away from reality - and then perhaps God allows their mistakes to catch up with them. Then they wake up and discover that their carelessness has involved them in some gross and obvious sin against justice, for instance, or against the obligations of their state. So, having no interior strength left, they fall apart."

Thomas Merton, New Seeds of Contemplation, p. 206

Seattle Fair Trade Festival

Cara and I finally found the Seattle Fair Trade festival after ten minutes of driving up and down Greenwood Ave. I expected balloons, posters, and other markers of a community festival, but the Seattle Fair Trade festival consisted of about ten booths, handmade signs blowing away in the wind, and an assortment of handicrafts laid on sheets in the parking lot.

Instead of being discouraged by the smallness of the festival, I was thankful for its existence. Hopefully, as people become more and more interested in ethical consumerism, the festival will grow in size and effectiveness. More people will become aware. More fairly-traded products will be purchased. More people will receive a living wage and a higher quality of life.

A highlight of the festival was a conversation with a staff member from Equal Exchange, a group that works with primarily coffee and cacao (chocolate beans) farmers. After learning more about how EE partners with communities to ensure fair prices and quality products, he gave Cara and I a generous sample of fairly-traded coffee.

With a deep inhale of my fairly-traded coffee beans, I thought, what a great way to start the weekend!